Monday, May 24, 2010

Motivation

*I wrote this last night but my computer didn't want to post.
I have been trying not to do house work on Sundays for the past few weeks for two reasons. One, having a day when I don’t work is a motivation to be productive on the other six days. For whatever reason the more time I Have to do things the less gets done. Not that I believe in having a jam packed schedule, but to much free time allows me to put things off.

The second reason is the desire to instill a rhythm and a Sabbath structure in my life. The hope its to make room for rest and play and self reflection.

Unfortunately my mad attempt at getting ready for the craft show meant these ideals were neglected. So five pm found me doing three days worth of dishes and picking up a week’s for of clutter.

As I puttered around cleaning a through drifted through my head. “At least now I can have a reason to say I am tired and rest." As soon as the thought fluttered through my head I stopped (mentally) rather surprised. It made me wonder why do I do house work?

Do I clean house because it is the right thing to do? Do I tidy up and clean and do laundry because it attends to my families physical and psychological health? Do I cook meals because it nourishes my loved one’s bodies and souls? Do I care for my house because the Bible encourages it as a way of fulfilling my role and as show of good stewardship and gratitude? Or do I do these things grudgingly out of guilt? Do I use them as a tool to gain love and acceptance from husband, family, or the ladies I interact with? To quote Ecclesiastes 4:9a “For who am I toiling?”

I know I will have days when domestic chores are just that, chores. But will I do them out of duty and obedience or as a selfish way to gain love from God or people. (As if that love can be earned.)

In her book Rest Keri Wyatt Kent explains one of the gifts of Sabbath. “If we dare to obey, Sabbath allows us to do a little experiment, to test the promises of God: what if I stop working, stop accomplishing, stop earning? Will God still love me? Will He love me just as much?” Of course the answer is yes. Nothing can cause is to loose (or gain) God’s love.

So, as I sit here on this Sunday evening looking at my to-do list for the coming week I wonder. Am I acting out of a heart full of love for my Savior or out of a heart trying to earn His love?

1 comment:

  1. I pray that your will have wisdom to understand the questions you are asking, and to know how to best use your time in your service to God. Thanks for sharing so honestly about your faith and your struggles.

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